Thursday 3 July 2008

getting older

   Old  Age, I decided, is a gift

I  am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have  always wanted to be.  Oh, not my
body!  I sometime despair over my body, the  wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the sagging butt.   And often I am taken aback by that old person that lives in my  mirror (who looks like my mother!), but I don't agonize over those things  for long.

I would  never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for  less gray hair or a flatter belly.  As I've aged, I've become  more kind to myself, and less
critical  of myself. I've become my own friend.   

I don't chide  myself
 for  eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for  buying that  silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my  patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.   


I
  have  seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they  understood the great freedom that comes with aging.

Whose business is it  if I choose to read or play on the computer until 4 AM and sleep  until noon?
 

I  will dance with
myself  to those wonderful tunes of the 60&70's, and if I, at the same  time, wish to weep over a lost love ..... I will.

I will walk the beach  in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive  into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances  from the jet set.
They, too, will get  old.

I know I am  sometimes forgetful.  But there again, some of life is just  as
  well  forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.   

Sure, over the years  my heart has been broken.   How can your heart not break when  you lose a loved
one,  or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit  by a car?  But broken hearts are what give us strength and  understanding and compassion.  A heart never broken is pristine  and   sterile  and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

I am so blessed to  have lived long enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my  youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face.   So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their  hair could turn silver    

As you  get
  older, it is easier to be  positive. You care less about what other people  think.  I don't  question  myself anymore.  I've even earned the right to be wrong.   

So,  I like being old. It has set me  free.
    I  like the person I have become.  I am not going to live  forever,  but  while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what  could have  been, or worrying about what will be.  And I shall eat dessert every  single day. (If I feel like it)


MAY  OUR FRIENDSHIP NEVER COME APART ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S STRAIGHT FROM  THE
  HEART! MAY YOU ALWAYS HAVE A  RAINBOW OF SMILES ON YOUR FACE AND IN  YOUR  HEART FOREVER AND EVER!

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Beautiful entry, full of wisdom.

http://journals.aol.co.uk/jeanno43/JeannettesJottings/

Anonymous said...

Blimey I can relate to that......as long as I am happy in myself who gives a dam....but I must get those long hairs that appear to have sprouted from nowhere on my chin sorted out!
"Have you seen her that happy smiley woman with the four long hairs hanging off her chin!!"
Karen
x

Anonymous said...

I love this, I really do.  I am printing this off and hanging it in my office..thanks for sharing.
Lisa

Anonymous said...

Oh how I identify with all of that!  I feel so sad for my best friend who died at 61, I miss sharing things with her so much.  My dear niece who died last week aged only 44 and there are others who would have been my age now if they had survived......
So much to be grateful for - the builders who whistled at me the other day - lol - perhaps they should have gone to specsavers ;-) but they did give me a laugh. :-D
Thanks for your advice on changing the duvet cover, unfortunately that doesn't work for me, as the cover needs to be completely open at the bottom, whereas mine is only open in the centre.  But you have given me an idea of another way to do it.
ttfn
Freda